Losing MyselfDying your hair, changing the essence of who you really are,Losing Myself by ~birdman011
Tears sliding down my cheeks cutting them like razor blades.
I never have lost the sense of right and wrong,
Shaking from the deprivation of alcohol,
I'm breaking my heart with Thor's Hammer.
I know I am the only one to blame; I've played too many games to change things.
Haven't cried in ages, never wanted to crawl into my bed and leave this world for the next.
Everyone is convinced that I'm on the ocean-line of my life,
Do you see a note on my bed? No, I thought so.
People showing their teeth like deranged animals on crack.
Resting my hand is smoldering hot fire coffee from t
Bracing for a Much Needed DonutWho's going to watch me pass away?Bracing for a Much Needed Donut by ~birdman011
The piano playing in the background as I take each step.
Bleeding my heart out at the ICU.
Switching my IV with numbing rum,
Anything just to get my mind off my failures.
Nothing good comes from being patient and tired of waiting for God.
Who is going to take care of me?
When I still can't even wrap my mind around life.
Turning up my television, to help me picture about families I will never be a part of.
The doctor tells me suicide is less painful then slamming your hand on the desk.
Every swig of vodka, with a complementary shot of whiskey helps my memory recollect all those times when happiness was
No Kemosabe HereSipping this poison til that yellow orb sets,No Kemosabe Here by ~birdman011
Convincing myself and you that I'm fine.
Playing it off as a joke, as my heart is screaming, save me.
Drowning my liver like Hurricane Katrina did to New Orleans,
I'm torn between my Jekyll and Mr. Hyde sides
Reality setting fast into the background.
I dug my heart out from the great blue of my brain.
And all I get are those damned rejections that prevent a spark plug to connect to my creative soul and the keeper of my emotions.
Being told that I need help, by the jury of Your peers.
Those hurtful words they concoct, they lay on my resume I send to every potential friend, to scare them away.
My Bella DeathWaves hitting my tingling-feetMy Bella Death by ~birdman011
Sand soaking up my slim-legs.
Can't tell where I am.
Drug-induced dreams feel like reality,
Don't know whether I'm more happy than sad.
More days I wish to step out in front of a passing car just to end my suffering;
Watching the proverbial sunrise rise over the mountain-tops.
I've realized that this is no longer a place for me to continue living in
Running from my problems for 20 years isn't a suitable solution.
I've lost everything, including my mind
Killed my morals.
Shaved my head.
Pushed my car off the cliff.
Snorted more coke than the snow storm NEMO draped down.
Why haven't I pulled the trigger ye